James Dyson! Stop! Your work here is done. Really.

JAMES DYSON - Stop!
You've done it.
Really. You don't need to do any more.

You can now apply your time and engineering abilities to something else. I know, sit down, you're not going to like this. You can now apply your thoughts to something other than vacuum technology.

The world does not need any more features for machines that suck up dirt from the floor. Really.
Honest. I asked them. They said no.



"Dyson, I can't get a good signal on my phone"
"uh... I made a prototype of an attachment hose, which can be manipulated in different directions..."

"Dyson, most of Africa can't access clean water!"
"uh... We found a way of manoevureing upright vacuums around obstacles such as chairs and table legs"

"Dyson, the polar ice caps are melting!"
"uh... "We added a ball on the main chassis that means you can turn tight corners"

Here is how people treat your work, Dyson Engineer Man. Feel the disdain.



SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR TECHNOLOGY FALLS INTO THE WRONG HANDS.

DO YOU SEE.



OH THE HUMANITY.

manmademound2